Single Review: Josh Turner, “I Wouldn’t Be a Man”

I wouldn’t be a man if I didn’t feel like this
I wouldn’t be a man if a woman like you
Was anything I could resist
I’d have to be from another planet
Where love doesn’t exist
I wouldn’t be a man if I didn’t feel like this

Hmm.

Well, this is kind of an unusual situation: a modern country singer choosing to resurrect an old country song…that was never that good to begin with.

Give Josh Turner credit for trying, at least. A lot of the current guys just pay lip service to Johnny and Willie, then maybe do a rawked up snippet of “Family Tradition” at their show. Turner’s going all the way with this obscure-ish Don Williams single; he must really believe in it.

It’s just an odd shame, then, that “I Wouldn’t Be a Man” happens to be such a sloppy composition.

The song is about makin’ love. And the verses relish the little details and sensations of that endeavor, making this particular evening, and this particular connection, sound truly special. That’s until, out of nowhere, that chorus comes in and inadvertently declares all the sexy magic, well, kind of ordinary. “I wouldn’t be a man if I didn’t feel like this. I wouldn’t be a man if I woman like you was anything I could resist.” It’s a jarring shift in focus that even the song’s steady, sensual groove can’t fully mask.

More significantly, though, it’s a bungled compliment to the woman – a mood-killer. Imagine being in bed with someone who seduces you with pretty nothings about how great you look in the moonlight, then abruptly adds, “of course, it’s only biologically normal that I should be so aroused by how good you look right now. I mean, it’s not like I’m an alien from another planet or something! Haha! …But seriously, I’m not.” If I were the woman, I’d probably respond, “I thought we were talking about me.”

Then there’s this unintentional awkwardness: if taken literally, the chorus’ lyrics dismiss the reality that there a lot of people who are rightfully called “men” – and not “aliens from a loveless planet” – who don’t find attractive women attractive. Not such a weird issue for a country song from the 80’s, of course, but for a 2011 release, it feels like a dated perspective.

So it’s all just a bit…kooky.

Of course, it’s easy to see why the record will still appeal to people. Despite an uncharacteristically detached vocal, Turner sounds both masculine and sweet, an appealing romantic combo. He even repeatedly identifies himself by the word “man,” probably further reminding you subconsciously of his primal, sexual identity. This track is engineered to turn you – or someone you know – on. And on an aesthetic level, it works.

But much like the act it celebrates, it doesn’t always make much sense.

Written by Rory Burke & Mike Reid

Grade: C

Listen: I Wouldn’t Be a Man

Buy:

21 Comments

  1. This just might be my new favorite Milliken review. I enjoyed the broken-down literal interpretation of the lyrics, not to mention the highlighting of the “unintentional awkwardness.”

    Though I want to like Josh Turner’s releases, since there are many things to like about it, I was unimpressed from the first time I heard this record. The chorus just seems so one-dimensional. There are much stronger songs in the Don Williams catalog to choose from.

  2. Great stuff as always Dan. I too like the last line of your review. I prefer Turner’s cover of “Lord Have Mercy on a Country Boy”.

  3. “Imagine being in bed with someone who seduces you with pretty nothings about how great you look in the moonlight, then abruptly adds, “of course, it’s only biologically normal that I should be so aroused by how good you look right now.””

    Best. Review. Ever.

    (Or at least close to it.)

  4. …just because the moon was rising slowly, he shouldn’t have tried beating him in terms of total lack of tempo.

    probably one of the nicest “absolutely no-tempo-at-all” ballads in recent memory. somehow, i can’t see this one racing up the charts.

  5. Seriously, what would you expect from a song co-written by a former NFL defensive lineman(Mike Reid)?

    Actually, I like this song a little more than most of the prior posters seem to like it. I’d give it a C+

  6. I will say that Turner’s version is better than Billy Dean’s was, but I’ve always thought this song was weak. I’m surprised that it’s been reincarnated three decades in a row.

  7. I hate to do another “I agree with everything everyone has said” post, but…yeah. I agree with everything everyone has said. This review was spot-on. It was both relatively in-depth for this site and fun to read, and it’s arguments are very strong and presented well. Too bad for Turner. Idk, though. Not much-if anything-on ‘Haywire’ grabbed me outside of “Why Don’t We Just Dance.” If he were going to do a ‘sexy’ single, then “Lovin’ You on My Mind” might’ve been a better choice.

  8. guys, this is a pop record. it’s not a country song. that’s why I think it’s never found a big audience. it’s adult contemporary & soul. but not michael bolton”ish. I’ve never been impressed with the lyrics but the musical composition has always floored me everytime. Still, no other country singer should record this song!

  9. I guess it’s all in how you look at it. But the chorus says to me that he finds this girl so attractive and irrisistable that it would be impossible for a man to not love her. Or in other words, the only way someone could not be into (in love with) her is if they aren’t a man or live somewhere that love does not exist. That’s the point I think he wants to convey.

  10. Hmm.Well, this is kind of an unusual situation: a modern country singer choosing to resurrect an old country song

  11. Hmm.Well, this is kind of an unusual situation: a modern country singer choosing to resurrect an old country song

  12. I like this song. Since when do lyrics
    in love songs have to make sense? It’s Poetic words to express how the feeling overwhelms him, body, mind and soul. To expect poetry to be accurate and politically correct is ridiculous. Have lawyers correct and censor every spoken or written thought is what it’s coming down to, although you write it beautifully, I don’t think it’s right to box in art like you are suggesting.

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